As I sit on the floor of our bedroom (remember that lovely sectional couch...? Yah...it's full ;)...listening to the snoring of several of the 7 children in our room...I think.
This is when I think the most.
Last night I was just about to fall asleep and I turned over and whispered to Dean: "What if we get to China and see Taizi is much more delayed than we are aware...like...what if they hand him to us like an infant and he's just blank...?" Dean comes close and says..."I just read tonight in John 15...if we are to love like Christ...He gave His life for us. So in light of that...we will love him as Jesus loves us". I laid back on my pillow with a sigh...and a smile.
God made it so very clear that little Taizi Fu'An is our child and we cannot wait to scoop him into our arms and love him for the rest of our lives.
After the kids were in bed tonight, Zion came running down stairs shaking as he cried. He said he just started thinking...what if he was outside and a bee started coming after Izrael...and he wanted to protect her so he stood in front of baby Izrael blocking her from the bee...and the bee not only stung him but a "whollllleeeee pile of other bees came after me too"...the tears started to flow..."I would be so glad I did that for her because she's so little .... but that would really hurt and I can't get it out of my mind..."
A heart like that.
I reached out to give my 6.5 year old boy a hug and he clung to me and cried and cried.
It made me think of Dean leaning over last night, half asleep, "we will love him as Jesus loves us".
A love like that.