Sunday, November 4, 2012

The night before.

This morning was cold in Shanghai. We walked for a bit and came back to get ready to pack our bags for the train. We had a taxi van to the train station. Once we arrived 2 men offered to carry our bags for us. For about $40. Um no thanks. Though we did need help. Finally settled on $17.  They carried them all the way up to the gate.  We sat at the gate for an hour. Others started coming and eventually an older Chinese couple came and spoke a bit of English to us. I stepped out there and asked if they knew if anyone could help with our bags. They said "yes…anyone in the train station with a red hat or vest" and they flagged someone down. When the man saw our bags he was laughing at the idea we were going to do this solo. His price was not even $10usd and he packed up our bags and told us to follow him. Remember this is 4 huge suitcases and all our carry on stuff.  We followed him for what seemed like forever. The whole time we kept saying "oh my…totally worth $10!!!!" he led us right onto the train and into our seats! LONg before anyone else arrived!  It was awesome!! I've read over and over again how adoptive families love the bullet train but there is no way around the nightmare of getting through the line w/ lots of luggage…well…now we know!!

We LOVED the bullet train! So amazing.  It posts the speed and we were going 300 km/hour (almost 200 miles per hour).  Amazing. It was so beautiful seeing the country side of China! The part we kept talking about was the amount of new high rise apartment buildings. Literally hundreds. Just all going up at the same time. It was insane.  

Azlan sat by a business man probably late 50's.  He loved Azlan. I love seeing children interact with adults. They couldn't' speak each others language (funny how we didn't have to tell Azlan that) but they played the man's iPad together and many times we caught them laughing away!! it was awesome! Our train ride was 1hr 45 minutes.

When we arrived…it was a nightmare with the luggage :) We laughed and snapped pictures through the process. Our guide met us there and we get into our van and off we went.

Immediately we could see the contrast from Shanghai (very westernized China) to Nanjing.  It was like being in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico on the beach then going to the real Mexico where people live.  This is real China.  I love it.  The river is gorgeous I can't wait to walk by it.  There's lots of hills and it's beautiful.

We were brought to our hotel, our guide brought us to our room and helped us settle in. Then I went with her down a few streets where she showed me a laundry service, a great Chinese restaurant (we even made up an order in case we want it b/c there's no english there) and other things. She went over our itinerary.  Yes…this is the exciting part.

10am we meet in the hotel lobby and we all get in the van w/ our driver.  10:30am Monday morning (which is 7:30pm Sunday evening in WA--PST time zone) we will meet our precious Taizi Tommy for the first time.  We will ask questions through our guide to the director and then we will sign papers and head to Walmart. Yes it's the first stop.  We will get his formula, diapers etc. then come home.  The rest of the day we are on our own. 

So we are in our hotel right now.  Azlan and Izrael are sleeping. It's 6pm.  Dean is getting some food for us.  

And for the first time in 14 months my stomach is in knots about meeting Taizi.

I can't even explain why.

I know that I'm not nervous he will be 'worse than we expect'. I'm a realist. I have a worse case scenario in my mind and we are 100% ready for that. If he's even a slight amount better …than we will be ecstatic.  

I know I'm not wondering what in the world were we thinking.  Because we weren't thinking.  We have not said our answer is yes til God shuts the door…in fact we said it would take such an act of God because we really believed our family was complete at 7 young children (whom we adore!).  Soooo God said "wait…there's more" and after a long week of Him showing up time and time again saying "will you do this for Me?" we said "yes Lord".  With that "yes" came an all out surrender and excitement for His plan. So much better than our plans (always is).  He made our hearts. He definitely gave us a love for children and a heart for the broken. We had no idea how He would use it but … now we know.

I know I love this little boy.

I know I have counted down the months…then weeks…then days to this moment.

I now know … that sometimes I just need to get my thoughts out of my head…into words…then everything makes sense.  The knot in my stomach is "is this moment really here…??" "am I dreaming?" 

Taizi….here's what I know about you: God has such huge plans for you.  You are not a number. You are not just an orphan.  You are not 'just another one'.  You are special. You are created in the image of God. You are so loved.

Tomorrow…you are our son.  

While tonight is our last night as a family of 9. 
Our last night counting down the hours. 
Our last night praying for you in that orphanage.  
Our last night broken hearted for the conditions you face every day. Our last night waiting for you to come home….

Tonight is so much more for you. Tonight is your last night closing your eyes without the love of a Mama and Daddy's touch.  
Tonight is your last night in that cold lonely crib.  
Tonight is your last night as Fu 'An.
Tonight is your last night wondering if anyone will ever find you….want you…love you.  Just the way you are. 

Tomorrow…everything changes.  Tomorrow you are named a prince.  Taizi ~ crown prince.  

I love you tonight. I will love you tomorrow. I will love you forever.  

3 comments:

  1. Oh what a sweet post... I am so excited for you! It's 4:12 here... I think it'll be around 10:30pm my time when you meet Taizi... and oh how I'm praying for you all!

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  2. I'm in tears ...you have a heart of gold, Janice! I'm so happy for all the love, warmth, and joy your son is going to receive.

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  3. I think I'm going to bawl when you post a picture of him with you....He has no idea how much his little life is going to change. How much he will be loved and how much he HAS been loved...by you and by his heavenly father :-)

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