Sunday, October 11, 2015

Only good.

Many of you know that I really dislike flying.

I'm not sure when this happened in my life...because it wasn't long ago that I loved it. I think once I had to leave my children home...that was the turning point.

I know we all know people that dislike flying. I promise you...my fear of flying is much, much worse.

Yes, I've been consoled that there's a name for it. Also been told many times by many people I should take meds while I fly.

I am really trying to do something different.

Surrender.

And oh...this one is a big one.

In the words of my husband: "I LOVE traveling with you. I get to look at your back the entire time. You won't talk, won't move, won't turn away from the window.".

That.

I want to be at the back of the plane because I want to see everyone if I need to.  Yes. I just said that.  I don't ever look at the people but if I 'need' to, I want to know I can.

Do I have control issues...? Ahhhh...!

Please...I know (now that I'm home and on the ground...) that it doesn't make any sense. But...when I'm in the air...it absolutely does.

So turbulence...? Yah.

No.

Yes I have it. A lot.  It seems a lot of our flights are just not...smooth.

Last night we flew home from Palm Springs, CA (a business trip).  When we got on the last flight (just a short 40 minute flight from Seattle), the pilot announced there would be no snack service on the flight at all because he wanted the stewardesses buckled up the entire flight as it was forecasted to be quite rough.

Seriously.

You know it's bad when.

He then said it's extremely windy out and basically, stay seated, it's a short flight.

I texted my friend and asked her to pray.  Tirzah was waiting up to see us and she was praying too.

As we took off, I was once again glued to the window.  Interestingly...I was calm.  I just had this strange peace.  A few minutes in, Dean put his head set on my head. I wouldn't' even turn to look at his phone, I mean... I LOCK on the window.  Somehow I've convinced myself that if I can see down...I'm safer.  I have no idea.  It's really not logical.

I could see down. For a good bit of the way.  This is late. 11:20pm.

Then there were clouds.  I couldn't see down.  On my headphones...Dean had played "After All".

One of my very favorites.

After all...You are constant.

After all...You are ONLY good...

It was right then and there that instead of being fixated on the clouds beneath...I looked up.  And the sky. Oh...it was amazing. Full of stars.  So clear.

It was perfect timing.  The panic was setting in. The song was playing.  I could no longer handle seeing down...and I looked up.  I wish it didn't take that...for me to look up. But it did.

Oh.  Oh....how true this is for so many areas of my life.

And...yours.

I was struck by how constant...how beautiful the sky was.  In the midst of my chaos.

I smiled to the window.  To the sky.

I really...truly...did.

Something magical happened.  The flight was the smoothest flight ever.

As we were coming in to land, the pilot announced there was a 45mile an hour cross wind and descent and landing would be rough.

It wasn't at all.  Unless I was so wrapped up in the 'constant' of my God that I didn't notice. And trust me...that in itself would be a huge answer to prayer and a miracle.

When we stepped off the plane...I felt like I was going to blow over. It was THAT windy.

I looked up to the stars...and just smiled.

So thankful for this night that God graciously answered the unspoken cries of his little girl's heart.  He doesn't always. No...He really doesn't. That flight home from Cancun in March was insane. All 5.5 hours of it pretty much.

We've heard it said many times...God can...and may calm the storm.  But if not...know for sure, He's in the storm with you.

I will never leave you. I will never forsake you.

Only good.  Good when He calms the winds and seas (that He created and controls...) and good when He doesn't .

Always. Only. Good.

The word ONLY in the song is so powerful.

He's not just good.

He's ONLY good.

He can't be otherwise.

Last night...He calmed the storm.  And this frail human being...is so very thankful.


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