We have not kept it a secret that we have been in the fight of our lives. It has been the storm of all storms. Left us broken hearted, in deep pain and grief.
In the middle of the darkest of dark paths...we found out we are expecting a baby. Instantly, I saw the gift for what it was.
Hope. New life. A future.
Several months ago one of my close friends was diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer. We were all heartbroken and on our knees. One of my first prayers was that her husband would buy the house they changed their mind on just a few weeks before. When she called me to tell me he bought the house, on his own, and told her once the deal was done...I was ecstatic. I knew that would be a message to her loud and clear..."you have a future and I'm investing in it!" and it was.
This pregnancy...right now...is that gift. No we couldn't have planned the timing. Yes the darkness is almost tangible. But this sudden unexpected gift now? It was a "your family has a future and hope" moment.
So much hope. So much joy. So much life was just breathed into our hurting family.
Ever since I found out...I have heard over and over and over in my head "the darker the storm...the brighter the rainbow." Yes. The storm has been horrific. Darker than dark. Pain deeper than I knew I could survive. Hearts loosely stitched together. Dark. But...oh the rainbow. A rainbow is always beautiful. Always. But have you ever seen one while the storm clouds still hung low? While the sky is still raging? The heavens almost seem angry? And right there...in the middle of it all...the stark contrast of the beauty of the rainbow. That.
With a strong heartbeat over 175 at 10 weeks, and a mama sick around the clock...this little one is due late March. Thank you for sharing our joy.